Friday, October 15, 2004

Too nice for my own good

Ok, I need advice on an entirely hypothetical situation. I would really appreciate a honest answer from as many guys as read this post.

Lets say that you, meaning you guys, really like this girl and want to go out with her. Unfortunately this girl has no desire whatsoever to be anything but friends with you. Would you prefer her to A) Go out with you when you ask if she'd like to and have her pretend to like you so as not to hurt your feelings. B) Go out with you on one date and have her tell you after you ask for a second date that she doesn't like you in that way. C) have her tell you right out when you ask the first time that she doesn't want to go out with you period or D) other.

I would really like some honest opinions on this and would appreciate comments on this post as soon as possible.

Thanks.

5 comments:

failon said...

This is one of those things where it's good to get the facts straight at the start. 'Guy' must know 'girl's' true feelings on the situation, otherwise pain and general unpleasantness will ensue. 'Girl' may at this point do what she wants, dating-wise... exempli gratia: 'just for fun', 'not at all', 'hanging out now and then', et cetera.
If thou needest more clarificationith, letith me knowith. *hacks hairball*

purpleoctopi said...

*pontification*
Well, I'm not male (obviously), nor am I an expert on male psychology (obviously), and because of these two things, a real guy's answer may very well be really different. . .
But even if you just look at it from the perspective of 'Human to Human', you always let the person know from the start. Otherwise you are "leading them on" (thank you, teenage lingo). In matters of the heart, the further things go into differing from reality or the truth, the more pain is derived from it.
So, given the aforementioned, the hypothetical girl should outright let the hypothetical guy know that while she enjoys his company, she only cares about him in a friendly matter. Because the hypothetical guy is basically flying blind in this situation, it would be cruel and potentially heartwrenching to do anything but, especially if the guy "really likes" the girl.
Another thing to consider: Hypothetical Girl should be absolutely sure that Hypothetical Guy actually "really likes" her before telling Hypothetical Guy that she only cares about him as a friend. If Hypthetical Guy is merely flirting with Hypothetical Girl out of boredom or whatever else, but doesn't actually like her, things could get rather embarrasing for Hypothetical Girl.
(Mwahahah. . .I think I've filled my quota of being overly verbose for the day.)

failon said...

Re: *pontification*
Thank you for being much more eloquent than I in your advice... Much better than my measly explanation of the same thing...

purpleoctopi said...

Re: *pontification*
Pff, your explanation wasn't measly at all! I actually didn't realize that you'd posted a comment on the issue, with the excact same answer until I'd posted mine. . .if I did, I probably wouldn't have posted a comment at all. You know, redundancy and all.
Besides, it was a lovely hairball

malicioushobbit said...

Ha
I feel like giving a straightforward answer, which kinda generally entails what kind of answer I like receiving. I'd rather the girl just come out and say it right away, because I'm sure the guy is being torn to pieces on the prospect and where everything lies. If it's absolute no, just tell him that, and the end. The movies like you to think that no girl likes a guy and he has to push and push and push for a date, which is really hot, and gets him bedded. w00t for propaganda. But just tell the fool.

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